Channeling Fafblog

Spouse: So, now that we own AIG Insurance, what shall we do with it?
Me: I dunno. Eliminate any dress code, first? Install day care programs at each office? Take junk food out of the vending machines?
Spouse: Do you think we ought to have them sell health insurance?
Me: No, we should encourage them to be better at selling their existing insurance products first.
Spouse: You mean we should let them keep insuring bad financial deals??
Me: Well, someone has to do it.
Spouse: Regardless, I think the bailout bill has to include executions of the executives.
Me: Good idea! Public beheadings, I think.
Spouse: That can be a bit messy. Hanging is very efficient.
Me: Yes, but you need lots of rope and a skilled hangman. A block and axe is simpler.
Spouse: The public square area at the corner of Wall and Broad, between the Stock Exchange and JP Morgan Building would be perfect. Leave them all hanging as an example. The pigeons will peck out their eyes.
Me: Pigeons and seagulls. Remember the olde English reserved the block and axe for royalty. Everyone else was strung up on a gibbet. So the top-level executives get the axe, everyone else dangles.
Spouse: Pigeons and the peregrine falcons, too.
Me: And the heads can go on pikes, like Oliver Cromwell's.
Spouse: You're right!
Me: So which of us was the Medium Lobster?
Spouse: I think you were, and I was Giblets.
Me: Me? I thought I was Fafnir.
Spouse: You were Fafnir all along.